Tuesday, February 4, 2014

Your wiener eats WHAT, Sweetie??

Hey Sweetie?

Yes, Nola?

Ummmm....do you see Augustine?

Noooooo....what's he doing?

Wellllll.....he's in the chicken coop. Again! Gorging on the "treats"!

That brother of mine drives me to drink.

Hello, Blogville!

 Did you miss me? How've you been? I hope better than poor Augustine has been. This dog of mine....oy....
My wiener eats everything. Seriously. Everything. Most of the dangerous foods on this list http://aboutdoggies.net/10-most-dangerous-foods-your-dog-really-cannot-eat/, although he's never gotten terribly sick from anything.

I'm not kidding. In his 3 short years, he has consumed:

-An entire bag of sour gummy worms. Whiiicchhhh he then vomited all over me. In the car. I kid you not.
-An entire bag of Lindt truffles.
-pounds of chicken poop.
-A portion of giant brownie...a la mode...which DM managed to mostly pry from his jaws!
-chapstick. More than one tube.
-Toothpaste. He prefers the whitening kind.
-Dryer lint.
-An entire tray of burnt taco shells. From the top of the grill.
-My COUCH!!!! (It was purple!)
-A plate of cupcakes.
-Vomit. Canine. Human. Feline. He discriminates not.
-Goat feed.
-Feminine hygine products. He prefers they not be new.
-Pig poop....

I know it sounds as if I'm horrible owner. I'm not. I swear. He eats these things when we are: asleep, out of the house, he's outside. He usually pukes up whatever he has eaten (we suspect he has an eating disorder)...and Boston then generally eats said vomit. Which is a whole other post!
Don't let his stupidly innocent looks fool you. He's a food thief and a bulimic. He's just not smart enough to steal food the way I do; when someone else is around to stick the blame on. 

What do your fur babies get into?



  1. Well...at least you get a hilarious post out of this behavior. Auggie is an adventurous eater.

  2. OMD OMD we LOVE the eaten COUCH that USED to be PURPLE... BOL BOL Now THIS is the kind of post that we LIVE to READ. BRAVO... FUNNY FUNNY FUNNY.

  3. Ewwwwwwwww!
    Augie, you are going to have to find a different extreme hobby than eating crap (literally, a-hahahahaha). Did we say ewwwww?
    Dip and Elliot x

  4. Oh my DOG! I likes to chew seat belts in the back sits of mummy's car! You must be kept verys busy keepings up eatings all of that stuffs your Mummy listed!
    Big wet kisses,

  5. Roxy is our yuck eater. She finds anything and everything. Luckily, we don't have pigs, and goats and chickens around. She mostly finds dropped food.

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy

  6. In the house, nothing at all, well, except for their own food. Outside, every bite of wild animal poop they can find, plus the poop of dogs they don't know, bird seed, dead things....some are so good they roll in them first and then eat them!

  7. HEHEHEHE!!! OMD, am I not suppose to laugh??? Ma said I shouldn't butts I just can't help myself!! I laugh with you cause I TRY to eats everything green, butts Ma usually catches me, and my funs are over. I love the couch. Haven't tried that one, cause I like sleepin' indoors....
    Ruby ♥

  8. Well of course you must eat the whole bag of truffles but the rest does sound nasty.

  9. Onyxx has eaten wood filler and Mr. N's vomit and Mr. N's hair. And the boyfriend wonders why I don't want Onyxx to lick my face.

  10. Oh my!!! Dakota once ate part of a CD and part of a cell phone....we caught him right before he got to the battery. Augustine is one lucky dog!

  11. Wow you have quite a repertoire there Augustine.

  12. That is hilarious! Gross but hilarious! bahahaha

  13. What is it about dachshunds and eating (or destroying) everything they can get their mouths around? I call it the game of "seek and destroy". And yes, mine eat snacks from the litter box and cat vomit, too. EEEEEEWWWWW!

  14. I love da used kleenexes - snotty wontons!

  15. Ok, that was seriously funny! Why I love Dachshunds, the never fail to entertain. Speaking of eating stuff, you should read Who Ate The Bacon.. It's a pictorial review of Dachshund guilt on mylifewithwieners. I'm not self promoting, I just know you'll laugh!

  16. That was seriously funny. If u want to see pics of Dachshund Guilt check out my post Who Ate The Bacon?

  17. Neeko also has a preference for used hygiene products. all three of mine seem to enjoy non dog sources of excrement, various plants, and occasional sticks.

    This post cracked me up!

  18. This post is hilarious! Thanks for sharing! Now I know my spoiled doxie is not the only food thief out there! Mine is not so much bulimic though)) all the unusual stuff he had eaten usually came out the regular way:) in his 4 years he stole and consumed a small pack of pine nuts, a whole avocado, a couple of protein bars, oatmeal cookies, a pack of gummy bears. And yes, used feminine hygiene products are on the top of his "favorites" list! Yikes!


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