Monday, August 19, 2013

I Have a Head Full of Grey Hair Now (or, My Dog's Too Smart for Her Own Good and Scared Me Shitless)

     Hey, y'all! It's Dachshund Mommy here to tell you about something little kielbasa did on Saturday that scared the living shit out of me. Seriously, I've only been scared this bad one other time since getting her almost 3 years ago. Settle in, this might be a while.
Yeah, she got another new collar.

     Okay, so it rained literally all day Saturday (and all day yesterday. It's been raining every single day for weeks) so Nola and The Minions 3 had been cooped up inside all day, only going outside for very quick potty breaks. They were going a bit stir crazy, given they're an active breed and all four dogs are 3 or under, which is why I was very happy when the rain let up to a slight drizzle in the evening.
I put all four dogs outside (in the fenced backyard) to run around and burn off some steam while Sweetie, Sugar and I sat down to dinner. We're all eating, and midway through dinner Sugar says he hears something. We listen, and don't hear a thing, so brush it off as Sugar getting old :p the cats making noise in the other room. We eat some more, and Sugar hears the noise again. Except this time, Sweetie and I both hear it. A faint, scraping and rustling sound. Once again, we chalk it up to the cats.
We hear the noise for the third time, and this time it's loud enough we can tell it's coming from the front door. Our door looks sort of like this:

So we could see that there wasn't a person at the door (and there's windows looking onto the front porch, so no one was hiding. Believe me, it crossed my mind). We're in kind of a rural area (as in, about 10-15 minutes into town), but we have fairly close neighbors on both sides and live on a pretty busy street. Our one neighbors have about 15-20 dogs, and 2 of them get out a lot and come in our yard (and get into the trash and shit in the yard, but that's a different post) a lot.
We figured it was either A) the neighbors dogs B) a squirrel or some other small animal or C) no clue.
Sugar goes to the door, looks out and doesn't see anything. We hear the sound again, and Sugar opens the door a few inches. A small, damp, shivering brown streak runs in and dashes for me. I'm about two seconds away from screaming or jumping on a chair, thinking it's a coypu (go here and look it up. Scary shit right there) or some other animal I don't want near me, but the I realize: IT'S NOLA!!!!!!!
Nola, who was suppose to me in my secure backyard. Nola, who was sitting on my front porch just a few yards away from my neighbors aggressive dogs (for my long term followers, these are the dogs that killed our pregnant goat when we first moved here). Nola, who was just 40ft from the busy road. Nola, who opened the gate just enough to squeeze her narrow, badger hunting body through. Nola, who would have been hit by a car or mauled and killed by the neighbors dogs had she not come to the porch. Nola, who was freaking knocking to come inside!

     I'm stunned, horrified, scared shitless, incredibly relieved, and very close to tears as I pick up my soaked and shivering dog. Nola, happy to have been let in and back with me, has her tail going 90 miles an hour and wants to be loved. I dry her off and hold her close, thanking whomever might be up there for keeping my girl safe. I'm not a religious person at all (if I had to classify myself, I would be a "Cafeteria Catholic", but even that's a stretch. I don't know where exactly I stand with religion, but once again that's a topic for another post), but you can bet your ass I said a prayer of thanks that night.

     Luckily, the Minions 3 are too stupid to follow Nola's lead, and stayed safely in the yard.
Nola is the smartest dog I've ever owned or met (she's also the biggest velcro dog), and that's not me being a doting dog-mom, which I totally am. Not only did she figure out that jumping at the back door wouldn't get her let in (a favorite pass time or hers, and why we have door knobs and not handles), she figured out how to push the gate open, realized I was in the house and didn't leave to search for me, went to the front door and waiting patiently until she was let in. Normally I love how intelligent she is, as it makes her a joyful challenge to train and an engaging dog to live with, but that day I wished she was stupid as the Minions 3.
Now she has to stay put. A rock, a collar, and a leash secured to the gate.

     I've only been that scared by something she's done one other time. She was about 9 months old, and we were on a trip to Atlanta. We'd stop at a gas station to pee, and while Sweetie and I were using the bathroom Nola escaped from the car when Sugar opened the door and went to the door of the gas station just as I was coming out (seeing a theme yet?). Luckily she was dragging her leash and I stepped on it and scooped her up before any harm happened. Obviously.

     So there you have it! That's how B gave me a heart attack of epic proportions, and why I'm now grey haired (very, very prematurely). And people wonder why I have such anxiety over her......

Dachshund Mommy

PS: Yes, it was sand in yesterday's photo. ;) We live in Florida, and Nola's never seen snow. And if it was snowing, little kielbasa would be bundled up. She demands her sweater on if it's below 60 degrees.


  1. It is hard when they are too smart for their own good! Glad she is safe!

  2. yep that is exactly why our mom uses MS. Clairol for her hair!
    stella rose

  3. Holy #! $@ glad she is OK

  4. Whew! I know that feeling of relief so well. Nola is one smart cookie. And I kinda have the feeling she won't be left alone in the yard for a long time to come... :)

  5. Thank goodness your tale had a happy ending!

    PS...never get a herding dog either. They are smarter than about 98% of all humans!

  6. You're too young to have so many grey hairs. We guess Sugars hearing isn't as bad as you think. Glad Nola is safe.

    Millie & Walter

  7. Old Chloe did that one night--we let her out in the backyard and it was raining...about 20 minutes later, we heard a little scratch on our front door, opened it up, and lo-and-behold, it was Chloe!

    Elyse (and Riley)

  8. That is every dog lover's greatest fear. We are so glad this tale had a happy ending. No more of that now, Nola.

    Most of your beach shots make us think of snow - such pure sand you have there. And of course, being the snowlovers that we are, we like to pretend it really IS snow:)

    Woos - Phantom, Ciara, and Lightning

  9. Bella ran off on this morning's walk and disappeared for about 20 minutes. She hasn't done it for ages... We live in a quiet area and she's afraid of people and loud noises, so it was more anger on HER part. Bella arrived home and is now being totally ignored. She hates that.

    Glad nothing happened to Nola.

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy

  10. Wow - good for Nola for knowing exactly where to go!

  11. What a smart dog. Too smart for her own good indeed! I love how you used a collar to stop the fence.

  12. Oh goodness, that is frightening! So glad she was ok! Mom lost Katie 80 lb white furry dog. she tied her leash to the bench and went into the bakery, came out and and Katie was gone. In her panic Mom did not notice the park bench was also gone. Katie had pulled then entire thing around the corner for some reason. Mom was not strong enough to pull the bench back, so she just took Katie and went home. That was on a busy street in Germany. Dogs can be amazing with their strength, smarts and yoga moves!

  13. Oh my I would have been scared shitless too and Nola IS one smart dog! To come around from the back to the front and scratch at the door? She IS smart! Thank goodness she is safe!

  14. The coypu was kind of cute...

    I am sorry Nola scared you like that. Silly little turd. Perhaps she and Faolan are related somehow. That seems like his type of shenanigans.

  15. I am so relieved for you, but my heart also dropped because I know this terror. So glad that smart Nola came around front and waited at the door. Nola, please don't do this (or anything like it) ever again. Please! Your momma can't take it.

  16. Oh Nola!! Your killin us!What the heck were you thinkin kid. No more escaping
    Benny & Lily

  17. HOLY COW PATTIES!!! Nola, don't scare your Moms like that ANYMORES!! Geesh. Glads you are safe and sound gurl!! Now, maybe your Moms should invest in an oxygen tank......
    Ruby ♥

  18. We are so glad Nola is OK!! Nola Please Please Please be careful!! Stay in the yard! Brando is our Gas Station scare! Have a great day!

  19. THANK GOD that your baby is ok! That Nola!!!
    One time my sister picked me up at the Minneapolis airport, and Noel was so excited to see me that she jumped out of the car! We are talking crazy busy traffic right out front of the baggage claim area, where everyone gets picked up! Taxi's, honking horns, the whole bit. I don't know how she didn't get hit! Thankfully she was looking for me so I was able to call her over to me right away! It still makes me sick.
    I'm sorry you had to have that feeling too. Hugs to Nola!
    Erica (and Noel aka Wellie)

  20. Oh man...that was super scary! Phew, glad that Nola is safe, sound, and super smart! :-D Take care girly!

  21. So pleased that everything worked out ok in the end, I can totally understand why you have a couple of grey hairs, but I am sure you pull them off! ;0)

  22. Whoa close call so happy all worked out! Several years ago my dad rescued a dachshund, stopped his truck right in the middle of a very busy main street in order to not hit her, grabbed her, and brought her home. Found her family, she had squeezed herself through the fence. Wonder if that was a sign that they would adopt a Doxie someday? Love Dolly

  23. We are so THANKFUL that you had the sense to go to the door Nola! Whew, disaster adverted.

    Tell DM that we'll send her a box of hair color so she can cover the gray. Better make that 2 boxes bcuz we know that scared the living daylights out of her.

    Lily Belle & Muffin


Thank you for commenting!